My Canada Adventure: Part One

Cindy's gone to bed and will leave for work with the sunrise tomorrow, so effectively our visit is over. I hate the goodbyes. It seems so unfair that we live so far, far away from each other. One of us (or both!) needs to become independently wealthy so we can start racking up the frequent flier miles (that we'll never use because, hey, we're independently wealthy.)

I've had a wonderful, adventurous trip to Canada. It went by way too fast and I really wouldn't be opposed to a blizzard hitting tomorrow morning and trapping me for an extra day or two. Sadly, the snow is forecast for tomorrow evening after my plane has already taken off, and even then it wouldn't be enough to strand me in Canada.

I arrived here late Thursday (as I mentioned a time or two already) and Cindy and her family were kind enough to wait to eat until I arrived. They had cooked me a Thanksgiving dinner. I swear, it was the best food I've ever, ever, ever eaten. I'm certain I would've said that even if it hadn't been 14 hours since my last meal. Cindy's husband, Kevin, is a chef and I know (know!) that I would weigh a trillion pounds if I were married to him. We stuffed our bellies and then everyone headed off to bed - since it was a school night - with the exception of Kevin and me as we started watching Team America: World Police.

Did I mention that I had gone to bed at 2am on Thursday and had then woken up just two short hours later at 4am to find out that my flight was canceled? I was running on really low fuel by Thursday night. I'd slept fitfully on the plane rides because they were small, cramped planes. I slept fitfully on the van ride to Cindy's house because I couldn't fully fall asleep in fear that I would drool on my neighbor or snore in their ear. (Y'all worry about that too, right?) So, when Kevin and I sat down to watch the movie, it didn't take long for me to start dozing off even though the movie was quite funny.

I was sitting on the couch with a dog snuggled up to me on either side. I had my arms draped over them (a Beagle and a Newfoundland) and felt quite cozy. I was soon off to visit the sandman and I stayed there, on the couch, perfectly upright until 6:30am when I startled awake and realized that I felt like I was 80 years old. I was sore; I was stiff; I was moving slowly. I shuffled my way to the stairs, grabbed onto the handrail, and heaved myself up the stairs and to my bed where I climbed in fully-clothed to sleep until 11am when Cindy woke me up and surprised me by staying home from work.

We spent the day reading our books beside each other in bed. We both dozed off for a bit. It was a truly perfect day. I was finally lured downstairs by the smell of another delicious concoction ala Kevin. (See? I've even picked up French since I've been here! I'm so clever, oui?) I only took a small sample - of a delectable shepherd's pie with prime rib and Gruyere cheese - because Cindy and I had reservations for dinner at a bistro and I didn't want to ruin my appetite. And thank goodness I didn't! The food was so fantastically good. We also had a drink or three. I had two Salty Dogs (which I call something completely different back home) and Cindy had two chocolate martinis.

During her second martini, the chef, whom Cindy knows from when her husband was a chef there as well, came over and told Cindy that he wasn't making a judgment call for her, not judging at all, but that she might want to keep in mind that each of her martinis contained 3oz. of alcohol and that her driving might be impaired. They're so politically correct in Canada. We reassured him that neither of us were driving and ordered more alcohol.

We finished off the night with a shot of flaming Sambuca. Sambuca tastes like black licorice which is pretty much the worst taste EVER. It does the trick of taking you from a slightly buzzed state to an "I am the funniest person in the world and everyone should hear what I'm saying so I'm going to talk really loud so that no one within a 100 yard radius will miss a single word I say" state, so it does have a redeeming quality. (Or does it?) These particular Sambucas did not want to be drunk (drank?) though because we could not blow their flames out. We would blow with all of our might and the flames would just lap back towards our faces. But we didn't let the fear of third degree burns on our faces keep us from getting our drink on; we kept blowing and blowing and blowing. I huffed and puffed, Cindy huffed and puffed, and after a lot of huffing and puffing, Cindy messily blew out both of our flames. My hero! We chanced our lips being burned off by the incredibly hot glass and poured that vile liquid down our throats, and I related my previous escapades with Sambuca from when I was in Vegas with Laurie and Sandy. Good times, good times. And then it was time to go outside and let the people on the street share in our conversations while we waited for our ride.

On our way home, we took a side trip to see a comet (which looked like a really bright star) and to go to a 7-11. Because even though it's -8 degrees Celsius outside, it's never too cold for a Slurpee. We don't have 7-11's in my city any longer, and whenever I see one, I have to get a monster Slurpee. They're so much better than Icees. So, I got a gargantuan Dr. Pepper Slurpee and we headed home to play Taboo.

I love to play board games. I never get to play them, so anytime I do makes me so incredibly happy. My ex-husband and I used to host game nights while we were married, but while they started out being mostly board game game nights, they ended up being Blackjack only game nights the last few years of my marriage. I need to start hosting a game night once a month. That would be swell.

Cindy and Mike won, but only because their counterparts - Kevin and I - were a bit inebriated. (Okay, they probably would've won anyway, but I like to imagine that it's because of the former.) It's quite difficult to think quickly when your faculties aren't at 100%. You're yelling, "I know this! I know this! What's the word?! Oh, I know I've heard the word before! Do I know the word? You Canadians have some funny words. I do? Okay, um, um, um, um, um, ummm, ummm, ummm, ummmmmmmm..." "Time!" Yep, another round without a single point because you failed to come up with "Canoe." Mike, on the other hand, could give one clue to Cindy and she'd shoot off the answer.

"Engineered Stucture."

"Bridge!"

"Medicine."

"Antidote!"

WTF? Who thinks of "antidote" first thing after hearing "medicine"? Cindy, queen of Taboo, that's who. And she'd never even played before! It was quite amazing. We went to bed soon after (and I slept in a bed from the start this time) and I slept wonderfully until I awoke fully refreshed at 8am. On a Saturday. Dude. So not right. Saturdays are for sleeping.

Speaking of sleep, it's my bedtime. I have a plane to catch tomorrow (unless that miraculous blizzard comes), so I will write Part Two tomorrow night.

Stayed tuned for the next installment where I go to a party, have a blast, meet Luke Skywalker, go to strip club, take a bath with Austin Powers, and do the walk of fame.